...behold...
I've been a little lax with my posts in preparing for the holidays. Both sides of the family in town this week, so there's lots to do! Just wanted to give you a little teaser. We got our engagement photos back from the lovely Will Knowles last night. I'll be telling you a lot more about his work and sharing more pictures later on, but for now, please enjoy...
...reception-part one: the space...
I've been meaning to disclose all of our whimsical plans for the most anti-cookie-cutter wedding reception ever, but our ideas are so gradiose that it's quite an undertaking. So I figure we'll just take a little chunk at time. I blogged about what brought us to this point here and here if you'd like to catch up.
The basics are this...DG and I are not status quo kind of people. We like to be different. Often times for nothing other than the sake of being different. Hence the reason my engagment ring boasts this gorgeous green sapphire rather than a diamond. I wanted something all my own. So, as it applies to our wedding reception, we want the whole event to engage our guests in such a way that they feel compelled to stay for a few hours. We want to keep people guessing, so we've pretty much thrown the rule book out the window. Anything that might possibly be perceived as stuffy or boring is gone. We're doing things our way, and our way includes a lot of very unconventional ideas.
Our original ideas were built around yard games. We wanted to be outside and have some activity to keep everyone entertained, but like I've said before, the venue situation just didn't work out that way. So we're bringing the outside inside. DG works for an arena here in Nashville which will allow us the use of the facility for free. (Yes, please.) It's pretty much a blank canvas, so we can do what we want. I took some pictures when I was there the other night. Like I said...it's large.
The whole space will be closed off in curtain just like the far end you see in the picture. To the left, is the stage. In the center, the dance floor, framed by the guest tables. On one end, a coffee bar, lounge area, and table games. On the other, we're rolling out the green indoor/outdoor carpet and setting up our yard games. Corn hole anyone?
It's hard to visualize, I know...but it's going to be amazing. Lighting is going to be EVERYTHING in this situation. Luckily, the arena owns a lot of what we'll need already, and since they're generously not charging us rent (believe me, DG has paid his dues), we'll have a little extra budgeted to rent the extra lighting we'll need. DG's working on a final drawing of the space, so I'll have that to show you soon!
More to come.
The basics are this...DG and I are not status quo kind of people. We like to be different. Often times for nothing other than the sake of being different. Hence the reason my engagment ring boasts this gorgeous green sapphire rather than a diamond. I wanted something all my own. So, as it applies to our wedding reception, we want the whole event to engage our guests in such a way that they feel compelled to stay for a few hours. We want to keep people guessing, so we've pretty much thrown the rule book out the window. Anything that might possibly be perceived as stuffy or boring is gone. We're doing things our way, and our way includes a lot of very unconventional ideas.
Our original ideas were built around yard games. We wanted to be outside and have some activity to keep everyone entertained, but like I've said before, the venue situation just didn't work out that way. So we're bringing the outside inside. DG works for an arena here in Nashville which will allow us the use of the facility for free. (Yes, please.) It's pretty much a blank canvas, so we can do what we want. I took some pictures when I was there the other night. Like I said...it's large.
It's hard to visualize, I know...but it's going to be amazing. Lighting is going to be EVERYTHING in this situation. Luckily, the arena owns a lot of what we'll need already, and since they're generously not charging us rent (believe me, DG has paid his dues), we'll have a little extra budgeted to rent the extra lighting we'll need. DG's working on a final drawing of the space, so I'll have that to show you soon!
More to come.
...beautiful edgefield baptist church...
Just real quick, cause I don't have ton of time...
I've been meaning to share these photos DG took at the church last week when he went to pay our deposit. I'm so super excited to get married there. I just love the way it feels.
I think we're going to get some amazing photos outside and around the church.
Here's the door into the sanctuary where the guests and my dad and I will enter.
Down the center aisle. We may have to find a way to cleverly detract from the lettering over the baptistery...but DG's got a dear family member who will be lending us his creative expertise to help us with the aesthetics. More on that later.
Gorgeous sanctuary. I love the dark wood beams and chandelier.
I've been meaning to share these photos DG took at the church last week when he went to pay our deposit. I'm so super excited to get married there. I just love the way it feels.
I think we're going to get some amazing photos outside and around the church.
Here's the door into the sanctuary where the guests and my dad and I will enter.
Down the center aisle. We may have to find a way to cleverly detract from the lettering over the baptistery...but DG's got a dear family member who will be lending us his creative expertise to help us with the aesthetics. More on that later.
Gorgeous sanctuary. I love the dark wood beams and chandelier.
...weight watching and the wedding...
Once upon a time, I thought I had to wait. There was a certain kind of person I wanted to be. She looked a certain kind of way, spent her time doing certain kinds of things. She was me, but better. Improved. And she could have exactly the kind of guy she wanted. So I set out to become her, hoping that if I 'deserved' him, he would come. We girls tend to think this way. (Gratefully, I was wrong. He came despite my imperfections. And he was so much more than the he I'd imagined.)
A large portion of this equation has always been my weight. I grew up a fat kid. I distinctly remember the first time I decided to put myself on a diet in my elementary school lunch room. I was eight. I spent most of my childhood and early adulthood feeling bad about myself. It was hard and painful being so dissatisfied with my body, but somewhere along the line, something changed within me. I made a decision to start taking better care of myself. I accepted my plight, knowing that I'd grown-up with less than healthy habits and that genetically, the odds were sort of stacked against me, and I started slowly changing.
It was probably about two years ago that my best friend (and MOH) proposed that we train for Nashville's Country Music Half-Marathon. It seemed like an impossible task, but we had about nine months to train and we knew it would keep us accountable. I certainly would never claim to be an athlete...and that three hours was SUPER hard...but we did it. I still had a way to go, but I was in the best shape of my life.
About a week after we ran the half-marathon, I moved home. I lost the support and accountability of my best friend and spent all of my free time with my family, whom I love dearly, but who also encouraged the development of those habits I'd fought so hard to overcome. I was saved by my a part-time job which required me to stay on my feet at work every day. Even though I ate whatever I pleased and pretty much quit exercising entirely, I gained only six or seven pounds in the year before I came back to Nashville. Then I came back, started my old desk job...and sat down.
So here's where I'm at. Down about 11 pounds since I've moved back. Keeping track via Weight Watchers online program.
A large portion of this equation has always been my weight. I grew up a fat kid. I distinctly remember the first time I decided to put myself on a diet in my elementary school lunch room. I was eight. I spent most of my childhood and early adulthood feeling bad about myself. It was hard and painful being so dissatisfied with my body, but somewhere along the line, something changed within me. I made a decision to start taking better care of myself. I accepted my plight, knowing that I'd grown-up with less than healthy habits and that genetically, the odds were sort of stacked against me, and I started slowly changing.
It was probably about two years ago that my best friend (and MOH) proposed that we train for Nashville's Country Music Half-Marathon. It seemed like an impossible task, but we had about nine months to train and we knew it would keep us accountable. I certainly would never claim to be an athlete...and that three hours was SUPER hard...but we did it. I still had a way to go, but I was in the best shape of my life.
It's the thing that's always hung over my head...and going into wedding, with the prospect of starting a family someday in the not-so-distant future, I want to look and feel my best. DG and I have had about a million conversations about saving our children from the same sort of self esteem issues we suffered as kids. His family medical history is laden with all sorts of preventable diseases and ailments just like mine. And his dad passed away at a much younger age than is fair. So together, we are changing our lifestyle. It is a challenge for sure, but doing it together makes all the difference in the world.
Even this morning we found ourselves out on the greenway near his house for a nice little run out in the sunshine. When we were on our way back to the car, I teared up a little (that's normal right?) trying to explain to him how much it means to me that he's doing this along with me. (He's already down over 30 pounds! I'm so proud!) Working together with someone who knows where you're coming from, who understands the struggle, and who is invested in your health and future is exactly what I needed.
So here's where I'm at. Down about 11 pounds since I've moved back. Keeping track via Weight Watchers online program.(It's less than $20 a month and I highly recommend it! It's practical. Flexible enough to fit in to your normal life and logging all my food and exercise is the only way to keep me on target.)
So we'll just keep plugging away. I've got about five and half months left and the MOH and I are planning to run the half-marathon again this year...exactly one week before the wedding (Yikes!)...complete with custom bedazzled bride and MOH wear, of course.
I know that I'll never be supermodel thin...but on my wedding day, I want to be able to look in the mirror knowing I did everything I could to feel the most beautiful I've ever been...and to know that what I'm offering DG on that day is the very best version of me and nothing less. More than that...I want us to be around for a very, very long time to take care of and love each other.
…we got the church!!!
As we speak, DG is downtown at Edgefield Baptist paying our deposit and taking more pictures of the beautiful sanctuary for us to share.
I am happy to report that things have been going well on the wedding front lately. So, so much to tell. I'll be working on some more updates over the next few days.
Yesterday was a good day, too. DG met with his caterer friend about our reception. I was so pleased with the deal he worked out for us. The food is going to be fun and fantastic and affordable.
Plus…these babies arrived in the mail yesterday. I'm in love. J
I'd originally seen them at the flea market for $15 when I fell in love with them, but of course, they didn't have my size. I went scouring the internet to find them, and ended up ordering them from Overstock for about $35. Not too bad for the shoes I plan to wear on my wedding day…at least in my opinion.
AND! My MOH found this lovely dress at JCPenney for only $80! (I am so all about this bridesmaids'-dresses-that-aren't-traditional-bridesmaids'-dresses-thing.)
...our nashville wedding ceremony location...
My list of criteria for our ceremony location is short:
- A church pretty enough on its own to require little decorating
- Good acoustics to showcase our (my) music selections
- Relative proximity to our reception site
- Lots of natural light
This historic church was built in 1906. It has gorgeous dark wood and huge stained glass windows throughout the sanctuary. These pictures don't really do it justice at all.
DG and I have looked into a lot of other churches for our ceremony, but none of them really suited us. Either the cost didn't fit into our budget, or the room was too big for our guest list, or the rules were too strict. It was always something. It just so happens that Edgefield was both our favorite and least expensive of all the churches we've seen. There's only one hang up. Being non-members of the church, we are not allowed to reserve our date more than six months prior to our wedding day. Granted, our six month mark is only four days away at this point, but because of this strict policy, the church has not yet officially confirmed that our date is available. We do have a back up plan in mind, but I will be really disappointed if this doesn't work out. I'm hoping to hear back from the church staff this week with some final word. Assuming that works out, we'll have another big peice of the puzzle in place. Cross your fingers!
…wedding details…
I had one of those moments this weekend when you feel like there's absolutely no way in the world you'll stretch the money far enough. For the first time, I was really taken back at the difference between what we'd budgeted and we'd been asked to pay. I cried. I find that this wedding thing is hard to navigate sometimes. The media is completely saturated with giant, lavish, EXPENSIVE wedding images, and one can very quickly start to get discouraged as what once seemed like a very generous amount of money begins to feel smaller and smaller. Even so, DG and I are extremely blessed to be as fortunate as we are. There are countless couples who would kill to have the kind of budget we have established. I certainly don't ever want to lose sight of that. But I still catch myself going back and forth. On the one hand, I want this day to be everything we've dreamed about. We're only doing this once and we want to do it right. But at the same time, when I look at a $9,000 wedding budget and feel like it's not enough, there is a problem I need to address within myself. It's not that we couldn't come up with a way to pay for more. We could. But at what point do you draw the line? For us, it's been drawn…and we will simply rely on our resources and creativity and the generosity of our talented friends and family to fill in the gap. Our wedding day will surely be the best and most exciting day of my life thus far, but in the end, it is only one day. And what matters is that at the end of that blessed day, DG and I walk into the ever after united as one. All the money in the world can't produce that sort of satisfaction.
Ok, enough seriousness!
Here's the good stuff:
In the midst of a crazy weekend, DG and I spent most of our Saturday browsing the Flea Market at the TN State Fairgrounds. With eyes open for wedding décor ideas and such, we found and purchased our first major thematic detail. To continue our lock and key theme, each of our escort cards going into the reception will be attached to one of these little gems….
And I think I may use this tiny padlock on my bouquet...
Oh, and I had to showcase this key, with the face, who is my favorite…
We spent a total of $80 on this assortment of antique keys. Considering that most of them started at $4 each and we purchased something like 120 of them, I'd call that a steal! It is a bit of a splurge for me, but this is one detail that every guest will see and touch and hold. Thank you, flea market! Can't wait to go back for more treasures in November!
…honeymoon…
There is one aspect of our planning where DG and I wasted no time. That would be the honeymoon. My parents have been so kind as to give us a week of their time share (A wonderful gift!), so we knew that we would be lucky enough to go somewhere really great and stay within our budget. We've budgeted $3500 for our entire trip, and after having booked the resort and our flights, we've spent only $988.52. I'd say we're doing pretty good so far. We will still have to pay the all-inclusive fee at the resort, but I feel like we are saving money in long run.
As of sometime on the afternoon of May 2, 2010, I'll be arriving here…the Eldorado Seaside Suites in Mexico's Riviera Maya
This adults only, all-inclusive resort boasts seven gourmet restaurants and a jacuzzi in each room.
Plus private beach beds.
What more could a honeymooner hope for??? I can't wait to relax and unwind on the beach. I know that by May we'll both be in desparate need of a vacation. There are still some more details to put in place, but I feel good knowing that we've at least booked the room and the flight!
(All images from Karisima Hotels and Resorts)
…save the dates…
So, I fall hard for good ideas. Mine are typically the brain child of the many inspirations from those who've gone before me and already done it well. Call me a copy cat if you like. I think I'm just well informed...and the product of my creative predecessors. J Thus the concept for our save the dates. Long ago I stumbled upon this ingenious wedding invitation via A $10,000 wedding. Bless you, Matt Dorfman, for reaching out your hand to pull us from our engraving and thermography box.
Pretty sure most of you cyber-brides have seen this by now, as it's been circulating for quite some time. I think it's genius. DG and I both love the idea of something so personal, so in the days to come, it is my quest to write up our story in a similar fashion.
Wanting our first contact with our guests to be very us and very Nashville, we've decided to mimic the Hatch Show Print design we all know and love. Something a little like this guy…
Or this guy…
Engagement photo session coming up next weekend. Save the dates to brag about shortly thereafter. Time to get excited!
...of wedding progress and procrastination…
I've always got these really great ambitions to write about all the little thoughts that pop into my head on a daily basis, but my life seems to be moving at a faster pace than I. Here it is, another week later before I've even made it to posting again. There are moments when six months and a handful of days seems like all the time in the world…and others when I start to get that panicky feeling about whether or not we'll pull off this wonderland of a wedding we've dreamed up before the end of the millennium. Thankfully, DG is a mastermind when it comes to execution of…well, just about anything. I love that I can just do the conceptual thing and let him figure out how to make it happen. It takes so much pressure off of me, and I can't explain what a relief it is to have his help and insight and expertise in this endeavor. It makes my heart warm. J
Some really great things have happened on the wedding front while I've been silent. I bought my dress…which is precisely opposite what I thought I'd end up choosing, but it is so very, very me, and I couldn't be more excited about it. (Now it's time to get down to the business of looking as good in it as possible, but that's another topic for another day.) We have also potentially chosen a church for our ceremony, but being non-members of the congregation, we are unable to reserve it prior to six months before our wedding date. Thus, we will not have that nailed down until November 1st, but that date is quickly approaching. Barring any unforeseen circumstances, we'll have that item checked off the list very shortly.
What I'm most excited about at this moment in time is branding our wedding. That may be the left side of my brain talking there, but basically, I'm a sucker for a theme. And I intend to carry our lock and key theme all the way through the wedding. DG and I are meeting with a very talented friend this evening to discuss all of the graphic design elements of the theme. (Can I just say we are so fortunate to know and love so many talented and generous people?? Our wedding is going to be one giant collaboration of brilliance.) First up, save the dates. We're planning to have our engagement photos taken either this weekend or next, so as soon as they're finished, we plan to get our save the dates out to family and friends far and wide.
As a semi-faithful blog follower, I am constantly looking for inspiration and ideas. Thanks to my dear friend, Google Reader, there is usually a surplus of fabulous DIY ideas. I had been really uninspired with a lot of save the date ideas I'd seen, simply because they to ultimately end up in the trash…which just seems like a waste. I'd toyed with the idea of sending them completely electronically when I stumbled upon this from Mo, of Elizabeth Anne Designs. DG and I are fairly tech savvy, as are most all of our friends and at least some of our family. Virtual save the dates seemed like the perfect fit, especially considering all the beautiful functionality offered by MailChimp, which is the FREE email marketing service Mo used. Excellent news for this spreadsheet addict. Sign me up.
The more we talked about it, the more DG and I got excited about thinking outside the box. Unconventional has become yet another theme in our wedding planning. Keep people guessing. Don't conform to narrow-minded ideas of how all this should go. That's pretty much where we live. Thus! We fell in love with the idea of going completely digital. Yes, ladies and gentlemen, digital save the dates, digital invites, digital everything. It's good for the environment, it's good for my budget, and it has the potential to be ridiculously cool. I can't wait to see how it all comes together. We'll be able to relay so much more information to our guests, and it just feels like 'us'. We've heard some skeptical comments, but it's our wedding and we can do what we want. Plus, I am confident that if we do it right, people will love it.
I'll leave you with some inspiration for our monogram…
…back to your regularly scheduled programming…
I've been a bad blogger. I know. I'd apologize, but I'm pretty sure there hasn't been any major uproar. Life has been crazy. So so crazy. But the good kind. I've been busy marrying off all of my friends. This Saturday my best friend and MOH says her I-do's. I'm so happy for her. Once we get through EV's Wedding Madness 2009, I can focus once again on my very own Wedding Madness 2010. (She and I have a habit of dating things. Sounds official.) I promise to do a recap of her big day here on the blog so everyone can enjoy the wonderfulness. In the meantime, I have a growing list of things to write about, to include:
- Choosing our ceremony site
- Purchasing my dress
- DG's fantastical ideas for our reception
- Color, aesthetics, and other pretty things
- Bridal party attire
- And oh-so-much more…
We're gathered here, hearts overflowing, to witness Your grace raining down
Joining hands, Love of a lifetime, One and only found
Love like this comes only from above
So Father, we are here to lift You up and pray
Joining hands, Love of a lifetime, One and only found
Love like this comes only from above
So Father, we are here to lift You up and pray
Fill them up with joy and laughter
Let their hearts be true to You
Give them hope in times of darkness
Bless these. We are on our knees saying
Fill this house, fill this house, fill this house with love
Boy meets girl, same old story, but we know there's more left unseen
Love of God in the eyes of another, Mercy's hands and feet
Love like this comes only from above
So Father, we are here to lift You up and pray
Let their hearts be true to You
Give them hope in times of darkness
Bless these. We are on our knees saying
Fill this house, fill this house, fill this house with love
Boy meets girl, same old story, but we know there's more left unseen
Love of God in the eyes of another, Mercy's hands and feet
Love like this comes only from above
So Father, we are here to lift You up and pray
Fill them up with joy and laughter
Let their hearts be true to You
Give them hope in times of darkness
Bless these. We are on our knees saying
Fill this house
Let their hearts be true to You
Give them hope in times of darkness
Bless these. We are on our knees saying
Fill this house
Forge ties that bind, unbroken
Give them strength to speak the truth
May peace be always spoken
Unite their souls in You
May their love shine like the light on darkest days
Give them strength to speak the truth
May peace be always spoken
Unite their souls in You
May their love shine like the light on darkest days
Fill them up with joy and laughter
Let their hearts be true to You
Give them hope in times of darkness
Bless these. We are on our knees saying
Fill this house, fill this house, fill this house with love
Let their hearts be true to You
Give them hope in times of darkness
Bless these. We are on our knees saying
Fill this house, fill this house, fill this house with love
...win a photobooth for your wedding reception!!!
Thanks to my new friend and fellow blogger, Krista, over at Becoming Mrs. Dial, I just learned about this awesome contest from thegiggleBOOTH! Seriously, how fun is this???
I'm dying for some mustaches on sticks! The photographer is based in Knoxville, but for a small fee, she'll travel to Atlanta or Nashville. I'm crossing my fingers that DG and I get lucky! Our guests would have a blast with this. I think the winner is chosen tomorrow, so hurry over!
I'm dying for some mustaches on sticks! The photographer is based in Knoxville, but for a small fee, she'll travel to Atlanta or Nashville. I'm crossing my fingers that DG and I get lucky! Our guests would have a blast with this. I think the winner is chosen tomorrow, so hurry over!
...dress indecision...
Back in July my mom, MOH, and I spent a Saturday trying on dresses. I Fell. In. Love. with one, but wanted to wait to purchase it until we were officially engaged. My mom bought the most precious little dress which was our biggest success of the day. It was so perfect for her that we couldn't let her pass it up. It's a little less conventional MOB, which I love. Found it at Nordstrom's today. See?
The other big success of the day was the settling on this dress from Alfred Angelo for the bridesmaids. Perfect for an early evening outdoor family picnic, wouldn't you say?
That's what I thought too....at the time. Now that we've decided to bring the reception inside, I'm having second thoughts. I know I definitely want something tea-length or shorter. For an afternoon wedding in May, floor-length is just too much. And I'm SOLD on this rich fuchsia-y, wine-ish color. SOLD. In fact, the color was inspired by this lovely dress from none other than David's Bridal:
I love the detailing of the pleats. I'm definitely reconsidering this option. There's a part of me that would like to have a touch more sophistication in the maids' dresses. Less sundress, more class...or something. So I went on a mild spree today looking for something that is an economical choice and has the flirty sophistication and unique details I'm looking for. Here's what I found:
Love, love this from J. crew...but it's something like $225. No deal.
Adore this from Ann Taylor, but once again, a little more expensive than I'd like. And I'm not as sure that the style would flatter all of my girls as much as some of the others. Of course, I liked it in the other color better, but the picture hid all the detail.
I started looking for more affordable options and found this dress at JCPenney. It's cute, but something just isn't as special, you know?
So I guess the search continues. I'm hoping to stay away from the wedding designers in an effort to avoid the markup that automatically comes with anything in the wedding industry...but I think I've exhausted all the ideas I had. At least I've got a solid idea of what I like, right??? Anyone have a great source for bridesmaid's dresses?
The other big success of the day was the settling on this dress from Alfred Angelo for the bridesmaids. Perfect for an early evening outdoor family picnic, wouldn't you say?
That's what I thought too....at the time. Now that we've decided to bring the reception inside, I'm having second thoughts. I know I definitely want something tea-length or shorter. For an afternoon wedding in May, floor-length is just too much. And I'm SOLD on this rich fuchsia-y, wine-ish color. SOLD. In fact, the color was inspired by this lovely dress from none other than David's Bridal:
I love the detailing of the pleats. I'm definitely reconsidering this option. There's a part of me that would like to have a touch more sophistication in the maids' dresses. Less sundress, more class...or something. So I went on a mild spree today looking for something that is an economical choice and has the flirty sophistication and unique details I'm looking for. Here's what I found:
Love, love this from J. crew...but it's something like $225. No deal.
Adore this from Ann Taylor, but once again, a little more expensive than I'd like. And I'm not as sure that the style would flatter all of my girls as much as some of the others. Of course, I liked it in the other color better, but the picture hid all the detail.
I started looking for more affordable options and found this dress at JCPenney. It's cute, but something just isn't as special, you know?
So I guess the search continues. I'm hoping to stay away from the wedding designers in an effort to avoid the markup that automatically comes with anything in the wedding industry...but I think I've exhausted all the ideas I had. At least I've got a solid idea of what I like, right??? Anyone have a great source for bridesmaid's dresses?
...bachelorette party madness...
It has been so exciting to be doing a little simultaneous wedding planning with my best friend and soon to be maid of honor, EV. A couple weeks back I had the privilege of throwing a action-packed lingerie shower/bachelorette party for her. It was such fun, so I thought I'd share!
I saw an invitation similar to these when I was browsing for ideas online and tweaked it a little to make them my own.
Next I made the cake! EV was kind enough to follow behind me to clean up my messes as I was baking. Such a good friend! I struggled a little to make the icing as thick as I needed it to be, but in the end, I think it turned out to be pretty good for an amateur. Everyone raved about how cute and yummy it was, so that was enough confirmation for me!
Here's the lovely bride posing with the cake.
And some best-friend-ness! Can't wait for her wedding! Only five weeks to go!
I saw an invitation similar to these when I was browsing for ideas online and tweaked it a little to make them my own.
Next I made the cake! EV was kind enough to follow behind me to clean up my messes as I was baking. Such a good friend! I struggled a little to make the icing as thick as I needed it to be, but in the end, I think it turned out to be pretty good for an amateur. Everyone raved about how cute and yummy it was, so that was enough confirmation for me!
Here's the lovely bride posing with the cake.
And some best-friend-ness! Can't wait for her wedding! Only five weeks to go!
…engaged…
Two long stories in a row…but this is a really good one.
DG and I had been planning take a trip home to see my family over Labor Day weekend, but as the holiday approached, we learned he would be stuck here in Nashville working. So…I decided to go without him. I hadn't been home since May, so I was anxious to go. He was a good sport and understood. I drove the seven hour trip by myself Friday after work. It was torture. I was tired and cranky and missing my man friend very badly. He called around 11:00 and kept me awake until I arrived safely at midnight. I was grateful. The next day, my family and I decided we'd spend the day hanging out together, so we planned to go see a movie at the new-ish theatre downtown. We'd never been, and Mom and Dad wanted to check it out. So the four of us (Mom, Dad, Baby Brother, and I) were out on the town for the day. Our movie ended around 6:00, and we were hungry, so Dad said, "Why don't we find some place different to eat for dinner? Some place we don't go a lot."
Being in downtown Springfield, I was reminded of this cute little hole-in-the-wall Italian restaurant where DG and I went for our first 'real' date. It was months into our relationship by the time we got around to any sort of romantic evening, but that was just the nature of living 500 miles apart. This particular evening, DG had come to visit for the weekend and desperately wanted to go ice skating. A boy from Orlando, FL who has an affinity for ice skating. Even owns his own skates. Go figure. It sounded like fun to me, so that's exactly what we did. After two rigorous hours of skating in circles and three nasty falls, I was battered and bruised and HUNGRY. We drove around downtown for a few minutes looking for something good to eat when we passed by Nonna's. I'd eaten there once before, a very long time ago, and knew it was a quaint, authentic kind of place. Right up our alley. So, all decked out in our sweatshirts, jeans, and tennis shoes we walked in to this little establishment.
It's pretty low key, so we weren't all that out of place. Immediately, DG noticed that you can see down into the kitchen from the second floor, so he requested a table up there. We had a lovely evening just enjoying each other's company and loving being in love. It was perfect. We even talked about how we'd have to make Nonna's a regular stop every time we were in Springfield together.
So…back to my other story.
Being near the restaurant and wishing DG were there with us, I piped up and said, "There's this great little Italian place around the corner that DG and I really like. We could go there." Everyone agreed that Italian sounded really good, so we hopped in the car and headed that direction. Dad dropped me at the street corner to walk inside and make sure there was a table for us before he went looking for a parking space. I opened the doors and saw that the place was virtually empty, so I immediately looked at the waiter-man standing there and said, "You don't have a wait! I'll be back!" I walked back outside to motion to my family, and they drove off to park the car. While I was standing there on the street waiting, I thought I'd call DG to tell him we were all going to eat at our place and that I missed him. Before his voicemail kicked in, he walked out the front doors of the restaurant with a huge grin on his face and just said, "Hi." I was in such shock that it took me a beat or two to even recognize that it was him because he was so out of context.
"You…you're not supposed to be here," I stuttered. He shrugged. "You're supposed to be at work. How did you get here?" I'm pretty sure I repeated those two sentences about 20 times over the 15 minutes it took me to calm down and figure out what was going on. I asked, "Is my family coming?"
"No." He ushered me inside and took me to the same table where we'd been seated on that first date. "Recognize this table?" he asked.
"Uh, yeah. Ok seriously, how did you get here?" There was a lot to take in, so we sat, holding hands across the table for a few minutes while I tried to compose myself.
DG explained that we'd missed out on celebrating our six month anniversary because of our schedules and he had promised to make it up to me, so that was what he was doing. I was elated.
"I brought you a present," he said. After we'd ordered our food, he slid a nicely packaged jewelry box across the table.
"Seriously?" I said. Inside was this beautiful key pendant. (He liked my idea!)
I loved it. "It's perfect," I said.
We went on to have a wonderful meal and ordered some coffee afterward. We have a thing for coffee. Somehow it's been present in every significant moment of our relationship. I don't know if that's sweet or if it just means I have an addiction, but either way, this was Italian French-pressed coffee and it made my heart happy.
DG pulled a tiny piece of paper from his shirt pocket and said, "I made some notes."
He was visibly nervous, but I thought he was just being sentimental. He read to me his thoughts of the six years we've known each other. He talked about how he spent most of those six years chasing after me and despite all the distractions and discouragement, life brought us together. He said how the last year has been the happiest of his life and how nothing would make him happier than to have me as his partner. Then he told me he loved me and pulled another, smaller box from his jacket.
"I get two presents in one day???"
He just smiled. As a restaurant filled with people turned to look at him, he knelt down in front of me and opened his tiny box to reveal the most perfect ring I've ever seen.
"Um, everyone is staring," I whispered to him.
"I know. It's ok," he said.
At that point he said something about marrying me and I said something about yes I would….I assume. That moment is a bit of a blur. Between the sparkly ring, and the people looking, and his tear-filled eyes, remembering the script word for word was just not going to happen. I'm sure I kissed him, though I don't remember that part either, and he slipped the ring on my finger. As he stood to sit back in his seat, our audience erupted into applause.
"Oh, you have supporters!" I teased.
It was like something out of a movie. He'd been scheming with my family for weeks. I fell in love with him all over again as he sat there confessing all the little charades he'd put on to pull off the surprise and kept gushing about the ring and why he'd chosen it. I love that he loves it too. We hung around a little while longer before we left and got in his one-way rental car. He'd cued the CD player to the Keith Urban's Only You Can Love Me This Way, which is the song he wants to use for the first dance at our wedding. I leaned over to put my head on his shoulder while we drove in silence, just listening. I cried as I sat there thinking to myself, "Drink this in. Engrave every detail on your mind. Memorize every thought, every feeling. This only happens once."
When we arrived home, my parents had invited my grandparents over and had picked up some desert for all of us to share. DG had planned to have his mom there as well. She'd bought tickets to fly in, but she was sick and unable to travel. We missed her, but I still loved the fact that at least some of our family was there to celebrate with us.
So yes…I am officially engaged! J And I get to wear this pretty guy around all day, every day, for ever after…
P.S.
Dear DG,
I've corrected the spelling of your good friend Jimmy BuffetT's name. My appologies. It was an honest mistake. I certainly didn't mean to defame your beloved.
I ♥ you.
Sincerely,
Racheal
…our story…
I suppose it's time I tell the story of DG and me. I've been putting it off because it's kind of hard for me to come up with the words. Plus, it spans nearly six years, so it's lengthy. Regardless…I'll do my best to edit. Here goes…
One fateful day back in 2004, while I was singing with a group from college that traveled each weekend to a different church in the Southeast, DG was introduced to me as the driver of our 15-passenger van and trailer. I spent a good part of two years inside that van. I've gone over those first few interactions time and time again in my mind, but my memory of those events is comprised mostly of sporadic details. My first recollection of DG was sitting at a random McAlister's on a trip in Oxford, MS. That may have been the first conversation we'd ever had. Immediately I noticed that he was smart and funny. We made jokes about the Melba toast crackers. (See? Random.) He drove a handful of other trips through that school year, and we became fast friends. When summer came around, it was announced that DG would be driving our entire summer tour. That was good news.
Throughout the year or so we'd been traveling together, I had suspicions that he was interested in me, and though I wasn't particularly interested in him at the time, I enjoyed his company so much that I wasn't really bothered by it. Our traveling companions would often tease me about the situation, but that didn't stop me from spending time with him. Over the three years that followed, we became really close. There were countless conversations over dinner or coffee when DG patiently listened to me carry on about this or that boy…usually one who was treating me poorly. I was a mess for a very long time, but he stuck it out with me and after I grew-up a little and learned a few lessons, our conversation evolved from being centered on me. Our friendship became a deeply meaningful part of my life. Most of the time we spent together was just the two of us, alone, deep in conversation. It generally felt like a date. DG usually played the gentleman and paid. I was careful to manage my boundaries, so as not to give him the wrong impression, but eventually I found myself confessing things. I'd talk to my girlfriends about how DG was the kind of person I saw myself with and complain about why couldn't I just find a guy like him who wasn't my friend. (I had put him in the friend category, big time, and there was no changing my mind.) I even remember telling the guy I liked at the time about DG and how I wished I had feelings for him. (Denial much?)
Fast-forward a bit to the spring of 2008. I'd been really evaluating my life and where I was headed for a while and decided that I needed a serious change. Moving home to Springfield, MO to be close to family seemed like the best decision on every front, so that's exactly what I did. Strangely, I was met with resounding support from everyone I knew, except DG. He seemed to be the only one so reluctant to say goodbye and send me away. I guess now I know why. In the months leading up to my move, we made it a point to spend time together when we could, which quickly turned into dinner or a movie or whatever nearly every weekend. I found myself thinking about him more and more, but I was moving home soon, and it simply didn't make any sense to talk about it, risk the awkwardness, and potentially ruin a really good thing. When I moved in May, there were a lot of things unspoken and even more unsorted thoughts and feelings bouncing around in my head.
Fast-forward a little more to November when I came back to Nashville for our college homecoming. I made it a point to spend as much time with DG as time would allow because it finally occurred to me that I had spoken to him only twice or three times since I'd moved. He was one of my closest friends, and I didn't want to take that for granted. Somehow things were different in November. I found myself pining for his attention and getting jealous when he was busy hanging out with other people. He was pretty much all I talked about the whole time I was in town. We had dinner together the night before I left to go back home. In that couple of hours we talked about relationships and our hopes and dreams and so much more. Suddenly, I was thinking about how compatible we were and how similar our passions and dreams were. It was a very different feeling than what I'd been experiencing before. Our conversation that night was so intimate that I once reached across the table and held his hands as I made my point. That was when I knew for sure that something was going on. Because in the past I was very careful not to show any sort of physical affection. But it happened naturally and by accident, almost as if I didn't have any control over it.
We shared a long (and awkward!) hug before he left that night and I headed back home the next morning. Something changed in his mind that night too because next came a series of phone calls that started out every few days, which turned into every day for an hour or so, and then every night for hours on end until we couldn't stay awake anymore. The whole time I was trying to process my feelings…making sure that they were genuine and not just a product of my being single and advantageous….and I waited on him to have the courage to be honest with me about how he felt. One Sunday night in January, a little after midnight, he called and our conversation led us in a different direction. He'd agreed to hop in the car with a couple other friends and come all the way to Springfield to see me the following weekend. I think the pressure of knowing he'd be seeing me in person again caused him to speak up.
"So, we're friends, right?" he asked.
"Of course we are," I said.
"Interesting."
That was how the conversation began. I had to convince him that it was safe to share what he was thinking, but after a little coaxing, he was honest and open with me about what he was feeling. I think I finally hung up that night around 5 AM. He'd said the kindest, most heartfelt things to me, and I confessed that I'd been thinking about him for a very long time. We knew that being at a distance would present its challenges, but having already known each other so well, we also knew it would get serious very quickly. While he was with me the next weekend, he was already telling me that he'd fallen in love with me. That seemed scary at the time, but it only took me a few days to realize that I'd found everything I'd ever hoped for in him…and more. I knew the emotional connection we shared was like none other I'd ever experienced. It was day seven of our "official" relationship, and I was certain we'd spend the rest of our lives together.
We trucked back and forth on the seven hour drive from Springfield to Nashville over the course of the first four months. In some ways, it was torturous. In others, I think all that time spent talking on the phone created a fundamental bond between the two of us that will become the foundation of our marriage. After being home for almost exactly a year, the pieces fell in place for me to move back to Nashville so that we could be together. We reveled in being together every day. It was heaven.
Now, I count myself blessed. He has exceeded my every expectation. He is everything I ever wanted. And he is mine. We've really known since that Sunday night in January where all of this was headed, but that didn't diminish the joy I felt when this man…the one I love to the depths of my very soul...the one who far outshines any man I could have designed for myself…knelt before me last Saturday night and asked me (officially) to be his wife.
More to come…
…dreaming of monograms…
I keep planning to put up some well-thought, organized posts about practical things and planning and such…but I think it may be time to give up on having the neatly packaged blog I'd imagined. My wedding inspiration and the things I find myself wanting to write about are not very precise. They come and random times in no logical sort of order, so I think it might be time to just give in to the natural process.
I'm so excited about this idea that I wanted to share! I have always envied those brides who are able to pull off a magnificently cohesive theme in their weddings while finding the balance between clever and cheesy. I've really hoped to find some sort of unifying idea that DG and I can carry out through the whole of our wedding. One that feels like "us". We started talking long ago about getting coordinating (read: non-matching) tattoos. I like the symbolism of such an idea, but I knew it would be difficult to come up with something that didn't seem trite. One day, however, it occurred to me that if I could find the perfect idea to design our monogram around, it could be really cool to use that design element in our tattoos. Thus my search began. And this serious of random thoughts followed...
First I found this monogram that I absolutely loved (via Project Wedding):
The bride and groom carried their shoe theme all the way through the wedding. You can see all the images by photographer Joel Flory here: http://blog.joelflory.com/says/wedding/julie-matts-wedding.html His work is amazing.
I thought it would be so cool to carry some similar theme throughout our day. But what was significant to us? Next I saw a magazine add for these fantastic pendants from Tiffany & Co:
Gorgeous, no? So the wheels were turning.
DG and I have often discussed this little dream I have of going to the Ponte Vecchio in Florence to place our lock on the bridge as so many couples have done over time. You can read more about the tradition here. We've promised to do it someday. The first gift DG ever gave me was the padlock and key I received for Valentine's Day. Thus, between the meaning behind the symbol and the aesthetics of having an image to design around, I thought it would be great to play up this lock and key theme for the wedding. Now I find myself searching the internet for inspiration, and it certainly does abound. We'll probably be sending our save the dates soon, so I need to get to work on our monogram and a general theme for all of our print materials. SO EXCITED!
Hopefully I can find or come up with some graphic version of an image like this, and we'll start there.
...reception venue search...
Obviously an outdoor reception is a bit of a risk. What if it rains? What if it's sweltering? No one wants to be uncomfortable on their wedding day, and clearly, our quirky little picnic reception is SUPER dependent on fantastic weather. Thus began the search for a venue that offered the atmosphere of the outdoors without leaving us completely exposed.
The first venue I fell for was this fantastic pavilion at the Hermitage Golf Course.
Just enough cover to shelter us from the sun and rain if necessary. Still plenty of outdoorsy-ness to enjoy.
Beautiful area next to the pavilion where we could set up all of our lawn games.
We really liked this place. Unfortunately, it turned out to be too far out of our budget. The rental fee for the pavilion is $1,200, which I thought was pretty reasonable. However, because we are getting married at the height of wedding season, the venue requires a $5,000 spending minimum…which means we'd have to rent more space and spend much more than we'd budgeted for their in-house catering. My heart was a little sad, but we had to give up on the idea of doing our reception there.
Next came this beauty…The Patio at The Mill at Lebanon.
So, yeah. Venue? Check.
The first venue I fell for was this fantastic pavilion at the Hermitage Golf Course.
Just enough cover to shelter us from the sun and rain if necessary. Still plenty of outdoorsy-ness to enjoy.
Beautiful area next to the pavilion where we could set up all of our lawn games.
We really liked this place. Unfortunately, it turned out to be too far out of our budget. The rental fee for the pavilion is $1,200, which I thought was pretty reasonable. However, because we are getting married at the height of wedding season, the venue requires a $5,000 spending minimum…which means we'd have to rent more space and spend much more than we'd budgeted for their in-house catering. My heart was a little sad, but we had to give up on the idea of doing our reception there.
Next came this beauty…The Patio at The Mill at Lebanon.
I loved the rustic, industrial sort of feel.
It holds about 150 people seated…which would have been a pretty tight squeeze for us. And the rental fee is $1,800 for the patio. Again, a bit of a stretch to our budget. I loved the atmosphere, but DG was convinced that it was too small anyway.
After we visited with The Mill, I was really discouraged. Don't get me wrong…it's a lovely venue. It just wasn't going to work for us. And I felt like we were running out of options. How in the world would we afford to pull off the wedding that we wanted? We put everything back on the table. Were we sure we wanted to do it in Nashville? Maybe we'd look into getting married in my hometown. Were we sure we had to have a fancy reception? Maybe we should just scrap the whole outdoorsy idea, take advantage of the free-ness of the venue where DG works, and compromise. I hated the idea of have a reception that feels like everyone else's, but it would still be "nice", right? So then I looked at DG and said, "What if we just bring the outside indoors?" The wheels started turning. What came next was a conversation that evolved over several days about just exactly how we'd pull this off. It will be different. It will be creative. It will be cleverly ironic. And it will be perfection. J I can't wait to elaborate on all of the design and lighting elements and all of the splendid little personal touches we've come up with. This is going to be the greatest reception ever…at least in our eyes. And that's what counts, right?So, yeah. Venue? Check.
…our wedding vision…
Ok. So. Before I get to our personalized budget ideas, I suppose I should let you in on some of our plans. DG and I started talking seriously about what we wanted our wedding to be like back in March. At that point, we were just dreaming, but some very concrete ideas were born out of that conversation. We knew we were faced with a bit of a challenge. Neither of our families drink and we knew that the presence of alcohol at our reception would make most of our loved ones feel offended and uncomfortable. At the same time, we wanted our reception to have a fun and interactive type of atmosphere, so we knew we had to get creative. Sadly many of the dry wedding receptions we've been to have been sort of ho-hum. Everyone stands around waiting for the bride and groom to cut the cake, and once they have, the guests have a slice and peace out. The whole shebang lasts about an hour. That scenario is pretty much the opposite of what we're going for. His family is from Florida. Mine is from Missouri. If our guests are going to travel all that way, we'd really like to be able to hang out for a minute. I mean, how often are all of the people you care about in the same place at the same time? Thus…we started talking about how to creatively encourage our guests to cut loose and have a good time…without the liquid courage. We want people to be engaged and relaxed, not bored.
Our first real conversation about the wedding took place over coffee at a Dunkin Donuts while I was in town visiting DG. (Up until about three months ago, DG and I were playing the long distance game. You'll learn more about that later.) We were contemplating what kind of reception we wanted to have when DG spoke up and said, "What if we do it like a tailgate?" Interestingly, DG has a bit of a man-crush on Jimmy Buffett…and thus, tailgating is a bit of a vice for him. (I know. Who knew?) As a beach bum wannabe, this type of atmosphere for our reception would make him a very happy groom come wedding day. At first, the whole idea seemed absolutely ludicrous to me. I enjoy a classy affair. But after further discussion, I started to get it. The more we talked about it, the more excited I became. We'd tame it down a bit. Yard games, barbeque, a kids table, sweet tea and lemonade, dancing…and lots of sunshine. We'd encourage our guests to bring a change of clothes and plan to stay a while.
We knew we'd have to do it all the way to pull it off, but I loved the quirky charm of the whole idea. I've always pictured a very formal, reverent, and sentimental kind of ceremony in a beautiful church. So we decided the ceremony and reception would be like opposite sides of the same coin. We'd find a way to pull it all together thematically.
First priority? Venue. We knew we'd have to find the perfect space for the perfect price in order to bring our imagined celebration a reality. This proved to be more a challenge than I'd expected. We'll get into that tomorrow…
(to be continued)
…wedding budget…
DG and I finally sat down to take a look at the numbers last weekend, and I have to say, I was surprised. All this time I have been utterly shocked at the idea that anyone could spend $25,000 on a wedding. Seeing as it is ONE day out of an entire lifetime, that extravagance just seemed completely unreasonable…but after sitting down with my nifty little wedding binder and going through all the suggestions for how much to allocate for this and that, what seemed like tons and tons of money began to feel like only a handful of pennies. It's already starting to stress me out just a tinge.
So here's the basic breakdown…
Where the money's coming from:
My parents have graciously offered to contribute about $7,000. Between a few investments DG is planning to cash in and the money we've already been stashing away from each paycheck, we have about $7,000 to chip in ourselves. So the grand total…to include wedding bands, our honeymoon, and the rehearsal dinner…is $14,000
When you filter out the $3500 we've budgeted for our honeymoon and the $750 we'd like to have for the rehearsal dinner (We're hoping to include all of our out of town guests.), there are 965,000 pennies left for the wedding itself. In an effort to keep a little reserve for any unexpected expenses, we're planning with a budget of $9000. So when there's something extra we just have to have, as we all know there will be, we'll have a few dollars to pull from. Hopefully with the cushion, we won't end up spending more than we intended.
Where the money goes to:
According to our wedding planning buddy, The Knot, here's how it all shakes out…
It's not hard to see that we have a challenge ahead of us. Some of those numbers are frighteningly small. Luckily, there's some wiggle room in there because all of these categories don't apply to us. For example, neither of our families drinks, so we can allocate $720 reserved for beverages to other areas. I'm going to get to work customizing the budget to fit our needs. For any of you who need a good starting point, I'd definitely recommend this little exercise on The Knot. (Just sign in and click "My Budget.") You can play with your figures according to your budget, guest list, and number of attendants. It will even let you add and eliminate categories to fit your needs. Since I am a bit of a spreadsheet queen at work, I'll be working up some Excel magic to help us figure out what we want to spend and how to stay on track…specialized just for us. This wedding is going to be an awfully creative venture. I have a feeling it's going to include a whole lot of DIY trickery…but I'm game, and I know DG is too. I hope we can pull it off!!
So here's the basic breakdown…
Where the money's coming from:
My parents have graciously offered to contribute about $7,000. Between a few investments DG is planning to cash in and the money we've already been stashing away from each paycheck, we have about $7,000 to chip in ourselves. So the grand total…to include wedding bands, our honeymoon, and the rehearsal dinner…is $14,000
When you filter out the $3500 we've budgeted for our honeymoon and the $750 we'd like to have for the rehearsal dinner (We're hoping to include all of our out of town guests.), there are 965,000 pennies left for the wedding itself. In an effort to keep a little reserve for any unexpected expenses, we're planning with a budget of $9000. So when there's something extra we just have to have, as we all know there will be, we'll have a few dollars to pull from. Hopefully with the cushion, we won't end up spending more than we intended.
Where the money goes to:
According to our wedding planning buddy, The Knot, here's how it all shakes out…
It's not hard to see that we have a challenge ahead of us. Some of those numbers are frighteningly small. Luckily, there's some wiggle room in there because all of these categories don't apply to us. For example, neither of our families drinks, so we can allocate $720 reserved for beverages to other areas. I'm going to get to work customizing the budget to fit our needs. For any of you who need a good starting point, I'd definitely recommend this little exercise on The Knot. (Just sign in and click "My Budget.") You can play with your figures according to your budget, guest list, and number of attendants. It will even let you add and eliminate categories to fit your needs. Since I am a bit of a spreadsheet queen at work, I'll be working up some Excel magic to help us figure out what we want to spend and how to stay on track…specialized just for us. This wedding is going to be an awfully creative venture. I have a feeling it's going to include a whole lot of DIY trickery…but I'm game, and I know DG is too. I hope we can pull it off!!
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