…our story…

I suppose it's time I tell the story of DG and me. I've been putting it off because it's kind of hard for me to come up with the words. Plus, it spans nearly six years, so it's lengthy. Regardless…I'll do my best to edit. Here goes…


One fateful day back in 2004, while I was singing with a group from college that traveled each weekend to a different church in the Southeast, DG was introduced to me as the driver of our 15-passenger van and trailer. I spent a good part of two years inside that van. I've gone over those first few interactions time and time again in my mind, but my memory of those events is comprised mostly of sporadic details. My first recollection of DG was sitting at a random McAlister's on a trip in Oxford, MS. That may have been the first conversation we'd ever had. Immediately I noticed that he was smart and funny. We made jokes about the Melba toast crackers. (See? Random.) He drove a handful of other trips through that school year, and we became fast friends. When summer came around, it was announced that DG would be driving our entire summer tour. That was good news.

Throughout the year or so we'd been traveling together, I had suspicions that he was interested in me, and though I wasn't particularly interested in him at the time, I enjoyed his company so much that I wasn't really bothered by it. Our traveling companions would often tease me about the situation, but that didn't stop me from spending time with him. Over the three years that followed, we became really close. There were countless conversations over dinner or coffee when DG patiently listened to me carry on about this or that boy…usually one who was treating me poorly. I was a mess for a very long time, but he stuck it out with me and after I grew-up a little and learned a few lessons, our conversation evolved from being centered on me. Our friendship became a deeply meaningful part of my life. Most of the time we spent together was just the two of us, alone, deep in conversation. It generally felt like a date. DG usually played the gentleman and paid. I was careful to manage my boundaries, so as not to give him the wrong impression, but eventually I found myself confessing things. I'd talk to my girlfriends about how DG was the kind of person I saw myself with and complain about why couldn't I just find a guy like him who wasn't my friend. (I had put him in the friend category, big time, and there was no changing my mind.) I even remember telling the guy I liked at the time about DG and how I wished I had feelings for him. (Denial much?)

Fast-forward a bit to the spring of 2008. I'd been really evaluating my life and where I was headed for a while and decided that I needed a serious change. Moving home to Springfield, MO to be close to family seemed like the best decision on every front, so that's exactly what I did. Strangely, I was met with resounding support from everyone I knew, except DG. He seemed to be the only one so reluctant to say goodbye and send me away. I guess now I know why. In the months leading up to my move, we made it a point to spend time together when we could, which quickly turned into dinner or a movie or whatever nearly every weekend. I found myself thinking about him more and more, but I was moving home soon, and it simply didn't make any sense to talk about it, risk the awkwardness, and potentially ruin a really good thing. When I moved in May, there were a lot of things unspoken and even more unsorted thoughts and feelings bouncing around in my head.

Fast-forward a little more to November when I came back to Nashville for our college homecoming. I made it a point to spend as much time with DG as time would allow because it finally occurred to me that I had spoken to him only twice or three times since I'd moved. He was one of my closest friends, and I didn't want to take that for granted. Somehow things were different in November. I found myself pining for his attention and getting jealous when he was busy hanging out with other people. He was pretty much all I talked about the whole time I was in town. We had dinner together the night before I left to go back home. In that couple of hours we talked about relationships and our hopes and dreams and so much more. Suddenly, I was thinking about how compatible we were and how similar our passions and dreams were. It was a very different feeling than what I'd been experiencing before. Our conversation that night was so intimate that I once reached across the table and held his hands as I made my point. That was when I knew for sure that something was going on. Because in the past I was very careful not to show any sort of physical affection. But it happened naturally and by accident, almost as if I didn't have any control over it.

We shared a long (and awkward!) hug before he left that night and I headed back home the next morning. Something changed in his mind that night too because next came a series of phone calls that started out every few days, which turned into every day for an hour or so, and then every night for hours on end until we couldn't stay awake anymore. The whole time I was trying to process my feelings…making sure that they were genuine and not just a product of my being single and advantageous….and I waited on him to have the courage to be honest with me about how he felt. One Sunday night in January, a little after midnight, he called and our conversation led us in a different direction.  He'd agreed to hop in the car with a couple other friends and come all the way to Springfield to see me the following weekend. I think the pressure of knowing he'd be seeing me in person again caused him to speak up.

"So, we're friends, right?" he asked.
"Of course we are," I said.
"Interesting."

That was how the conversation began. I had to convince him that it was safe to share what he was thinking, but after a little coaxing, he was honest and open with me about what he was feeling. I think I finally hung up that night around 5 AM. He'd said the kindest, most heartfelt things to me, and I confessed that I'd been thinking about him for a very long time. We knew that being at a distance would present its challenges, but having already known each other so well, we also knew it would get serious very quickly. While he was with me the next weekend, he was already telling me that he'd fallen in love with me. That seemed scary at the time, but it only took me a few days to realize that I'd found everything I'd ever hoped for in him…and more. I knew the emotional connection we shared was like none other I'd ever experienced. It was day seven of our "official" relationship, and I was certain we'd spend the rest of our lives together.

We trucked back and forth on the seven hour drive from Springfield to Nashville over the course of the first four months. In some ways, it was torturous. In others, I think all that time spent talking on the phone created a fundamental bond between the two of us that will become the foundation of our marriage. After being home for almost exactly a year, the pieces fell in place for me to move back to Nashville so that we could be together. We reveled in being together every day. It was heaven.

Now, I count myself blessed. He has exceeded my every expectation. He is everything I ever wanted. And he is mine. We've really known since that Sunday night in January where all of this was headed, but that didn't diminish the joy I felt when this man…the one I love to the depths of my very soul...the one who far outshines any man I could have designed for myself…knelt before me last Saturday night and asked me (officially) to be his wife.

More to come…